This is an TOTALLY REAL (joke) timeline created by esik.
WARNING: foul language, racism and another bullshit and let ur kids read it
50000 BC Edit
- Neanderthals do not remember how to make wheels. The wheel was never heard from again.
15 BC Edit
- Nuclear Bomb is invented by sheep fuckers and toxic kids
- 2017: The United States of McDonalds has fucking trouble dealing with ISIS douchebag in Iran & Iraq.
- 2017: AGP farts or something.
- 2018: The Mutant Sheep Fucking Syndicate scum are formed after a nuclear test in Iran by North Korea.
2019: DECorp cool aid bois are formed P.S they are never heard from again.
- 2020: The Mutant Sheep Fucking Syndicate stay on the outskirts of Mosul, killing anything they see and putting their micro-dicks in corpses' assholes.
- 2020: Conflicts occur between Sanders States of KFC & United States of McDonalds resulting in a small war for sheep fucking.
- 2020: The Mutant Syndicate get inside Mosul, ISIS sells the sheeps to fuck.
- 2022: Into my asshole place in ur bedroom
- 2023: Sanders KFC begin to plan a isis attack on Niggeria & Ching Dick Chong.
- 2024: Resources,sheeps and planes are gathered for the attack plan.
- 2025: Sanders States of KFC steal 4 planes in a hangar a few miles away from Mosul.
- 2025: 2 stolen in Hong Dick Kong streets, the other 2 are fucked and killed in publicic
- The 240 sheeps-fuckers in Niggeria go across the country, fucking sheeps, raping big-assed black women, & raiding small villages.
- The sheeps-fuckers in Hong Dick Kong rampage through the streets, opening fire on non-sheeps fuckers & rappers.
- 2026: The war between fat princesses and neanderthals begins.
- 2032: End of the war; the Cheeseburger Goes Boom.
- Sanders States of KFC invades southeastern United States of McDonalds.
- United States of McDonalds invades Fried Chicken Land and southeastern Made-In-China.
- The Outer Banks are hit by several planes that goes Allah Akbar.
- Rockport is hit by several planes that Allah Akbar.
- Pearl City is hit by two planes that Allah Akbar.
- Las Vegas & Boulder City are hit by three planes that Allah Akbar.
- 2033: The Enclave is formed.
- 2033: Into The Storm II takes place in Western Africa.
- 203X: Shit sniffers™ is founded
- 203X: Nuclear winter begins.
- 203X: Colonel Sanders Fried Chicken are scattered across the Wasteland, still following their goal of fattening off the human race.
- 2039: After the World Goes Boom: Deep Asshole takes place.
- 204X: Nuclear snow ends.
- 2047: After the World Goes Boom takes place.
- 2052: Into The Storm III takes place in Las Vegas, Nevada.
- 2054: After the World Goes Boom: Anime Land takes place.
- 2055: CDF douchebags buys dock where Dicktown will be built.
- 2056: Docktown built by CDF douchebags.
- 2067: After the World Goes Boom: Darude Storm takes place.
- 207X: Construction of New Atlanta begins, several miles south of KFC.
- 207X: United States of McDonalds restores contact with other countries such as AIDS, Tea-drinkers, and Iberia.
- 2070: Dank Hank Carter is born in a shack in Redneck Town
- 208X: CDF douchebags and the Enclave make groundbreaking whorehouses.
- 208X: People begin abandoning McDonalds Funded Living Facilities for more healthy living conditions in whorehouses.
- 208X: Towns of cow feces and rock begin reappearing.
- 208X: National trade picks up, because these fucking neanderthals learn how to share their fucking rocks.
- 2085: Ass Smashing Facility finished.
- 2089: Darudesharks capture Masterson Dank Facility.
- 208/9X: The Enclave prepares to fight what it calls terrorists in Pearl Harbor.
- 208/9X: CDF douchebags gains control of Masterson Dank Facility, averting the Enclave antiterrorism campaign.
- 2096: The Bullshit Wars occurs.
- Several low-ranking CDF douchebags and Enclave officials are raped.
- There is a large military conflict in downtown New Atlanta.
- Republic of Titwater forms.
- The Enclave splits into Eastern Weeabos and Western Geeks.
- 209/10X: The PRT, with the help of AIDS, begins taking land from the United States of McDonalds.
- 210X: The AIDS rebuilds the Panama Canal.
- 2103: After the World Goes Boom: Meme Wars takes place.
- 2115: After the World Goes Boom: Dank REDs takes place.
- 2115: The Underground Bunker, Concentration Camp
Bredtvet, and Fort Mememington **SHARE** forest fires.
- Fort ChadJew's barracks, HR rooms, comms center, and cafeteria are blown up.
- Fort Mememington's barracks, vehicle repair center, comms center, and cafeteria are blown up.
- Several Enclave and CDF douchebags tanks, APCs, Vertabirds and artillery pieces are blown up.
- Southshit's Sand Shark and Dickhole Smashing Facility are blown up (RIP Linkin Park and Bernie Sanders.
- The Tirewater side of the Halfmoon Bridge is boomed.
- Damn Canadians attack from the north with fucking hand held rail tanks.
- Canadians re-blow the world up.
- Canadians become supreme leader of the Americas.
- 2115: Soup Shark and Post Office rebuilt by cheap plastic Made-In-China shit.
- Tidewater Gestapo Service beat up some Crooked Democrats
- Genghis Khan 2.0 rapes Colonel Shitstain (major event!!11!)